Its a funny Story...kinda

[dmcintyre86]

I have been having stomach and bowel issues lately.....not fun.
Anyways, I get a call last night at 2:30am for a lockout request.
The homeowner had just got home from Disneyland and was locked out of his home.

He had installed Defiant deadbolts on his home after moving in...and i could not pick the front door to save my life...i moved on to the side door...and got it open within a few minutes. I thought we were done and suddenly felt my stomach drop about 3 inches...uh oh...then the homeowner said he was mistaken...the Garage door to the house was also dead bolted....oh no...

Can i make it? My body is telling me to assume the needed position ASAP...but i cant leave a customer hanging in his front yard with all his kids sleeping in their minivan...it is like 3AM...so after some toe touching and steching behind my work truck i feel like i might be able to hold on to get this last lock opened....Wrong! I got the lock opened fine...but as i was carrying my bag back to the truck and going to retrieve the invoice paperwork IT HAPPENED>

I am embarrassed to say i literally "pooped" myself...

I took payment from the delighted and relieved homeowner, and got out of there As quick as possible.
I made it two more blocks and found a 7-11 and relieved the rest of me in their restroom.

after cleaning the seat in the truck and throwing away the pants i was wearing...and returning home to a hott shower...i have decided maybe its time to go to the doctor. at least it didn't happen while i was picking the lock but geezz how embarrassing. I don't think the customer noticed...i didn't stick around long enough and kept my distance...haha

I would love to hear any similar stories from you guys out there on the road...maybe that will take the power out of this experience haha.

Mabey i should change the company name to Poop-Stain Locksmith?

thoughts, Ideas?

[dmcintyre86]

Jus thought you guys might get a laugh out of this one...

[1mrchristopher]

Definitely time to schedule that appointment! Also, make time for the bathroom whenever the urge hits, don't put it off unless you absolutely have to. Sure you don't want to leave in the middle of a job, but if you are working on something in the shop, or at home, don't 'hold it.' It's best to relieve yourself as soon after you become aware as possible. I'm terrible about this - I feel like it's such an inconvenience to have to quit what I'm doing to go to the bathroom, but in reality it's the best thing to do.

[GWiens2001]

Hope you are feeling better. Go see that doctor. Working that late at night, no wonder you were pooped. And am guilty of holding it at work 'until I get this step done', which becomes the next step, and the next. It is better to just find a bathroom.

Gordon

[dmcintyre86]

yea i would have had no issues with seeking the bathroom if there was one readily available. lol but i was kinda stuck...lesson learned - never trust a fart and always error on the side of caution. hahaha

[billdeserthills]

Is it possible that you are lactose intolerant? That is one of the major causes of cramping and other nastiness. If you wanna save the Dr money, you could try removing milk & cheese based foods from your diet, I did years ago. I just actually found that sharp cheddar often will say No Lactose on the back and it doesn't make me sick.

[dmcintyre86]

Bill, bill, bill.....

Your making a lot of sense with your reply...i hate to admit it...but i am probably the biggest cheese addict out there...This vise of mine is probably not helping me...

I will take your advise and cut back, we shall see what happens...i wonder if there is a 12 step program for cheese?
Cheese Addicts Anonymous?? C.A.A.?
HAHA

-dave

[phrygianradar]

Such a fun nights work! I used to get sick like that all the time and had to stop eating all dairy, which sucked because I am also a cheese addict (hi I'm Nathan and I'm a cheese-aholic). I started taking probiotic pills and now I have almost no issues from cheese or dairy. Although I don't eat sour cream because I am still scared of it. That stuff, although delicious, is like draino... Good luck with that and I would try going dairy free for a few days to see how you feel.

[1mrchristopher]

For me the culprit was onions - I produced weapons grade farts, and was running for the toilet pretty regularly. I love cheese myself, but it doesn't bother me. What helped with the onion sensitivity, and even made it disappear was a probiotic called Align. I still take the Wally World generic of it when my stomach starts to get funny, or if I have to take antibiotics. One week of the stuff and I'm completely straightened out. It might be worth a try in your case, it's much less expensive than a visit to the MD, and maybe you wouldn't have to give up your drug of choice (cheese ).

[GWiens2001]

Heh heh heh.Bill is recommending you cut the cheese. Heh heh heh.

Gordon

[Sinifar]

Life happens. We all go thru emotional upsets. They seem to come in "batches" - that is one is having intestinal problems for a time, then it goes away. Running a business can be hard on one's system. It is not all fun and games.There are emotional highs which are super, and lows which are the absolute pits.

Having said all that - YES I have gone thru this problem in the past, and with luck it won't repeat. The answer is how you know this is going on. You usually don't have this suddenly drop out of the blue on you, it has been building over the past few days. The "day" if the really big explosion has been building inside you, the cramps, the gas, the bloating, you just know that soon there will be a major explosion and there is nothing you can do to stop it. The internal pressure is way too much to even try to hold in. This is not the time to be out on the job, or anywhere away from porcelain.

So you either don't work until the blast passes, or you get creative.

We used to camp - a lot. Over the nearly 35 years of living outdoors, we have tons of equipment around here. One of the goodies we have are the "port-a-potties". These are nothing more than two piece "jons" - a tank of water on top, and a receiving tank which is removable on the bottom to receive the mess. You take the pair apart and take the lower tank inside someplace later to dump. Having all females in the family they hated going or using the public restrooms in campground. Trust me, if you haven't' been in one, it is a stinking mess. SO we came up with this for them to use, either in the tent, or later in the the Coleman trailers. Yup - everybody "outside" it's time to use the "facility".

I only mention this because back in the day of having large E250 - E350 Super vans, I built into the back of the van a "rest room" much like an RV's - using windshield washer "blue fluid" to flush them. This solved our problem on the road for the shop as well. It doesn't smell, it sits quietly in the back corner of the van in it's own little "room" I built, about 2.5 x 2.5 feet with a door on it swinging into the aisle to provide some kind of view block. Need to go? Excuse yourself for a bit, return to the truck, do your "thing" then return to the job. Nobody was the wiser as to what happened while you are out looking for a part.

Works summer or winter. Just an old hands work around to a complex problem.

It also provided a rest room on construction sites where there was no port a jon provided by the general - and several other fun applications where finding a rest room / using the customers is out of the question, like in some really ritzy home where your presence is only tolerated because they really need the locks worked on. Trust me, there are times when you just gotta have to go, and the only thing around is your own self provided rest room.

The new Transit Connect is too small to include this nifty unit, but if there are emotional problems brewing, I will take the unit along stuffed in the back -- it has a decorative cover, and can be used to store other things on top without causing much attention. When we used the VW Camper for a road unit, that was the unit we used for a bench to work on. So my experience at RV's pays a dividend.

My experience - you may have different ones - just making an RV out of a road unit is not a big deal. Just plan on things to happen and take the proper steps and you will be prepared for almost anything.

Sinifar

[KPick]

I lol'd sorry.

It's good to hear you're alright now though. You should have emptied your bowels back at home.

[billdeserthills]

I lol'd sorry.

It's good to hear you're alright now though. You should have emptied your bowels back at home.

Your gonna take all the challenge out of it for him

[KPick]

Ahahaha.

[1mrchristopher]

So, I haven't been taking my probiotic for a month or so, and last night I took the wife out to a pizza place. I had a local specialty the "Asbeck Special," sausage, bratwurst, onions, sauerkraut, and pineapple. It was so good I ate the entire small pizza in one sitting. Massive error. I came close to repeating dmcentyre86's performance this morning, and I can't stand to be in a room with myself right now!